In 2019, my husband Rob, our children Audrey and Sam, and I, moved from Washington, DC, to my hometown of Syracuse, New York. The kids were reaching school age, and big city life was becoming a challenge. The idea of moving to Syracuse was not Rob’s top choice at first. He hailed from the West Coast and had been stationed in many interesting places during his Army career. But he came to really enjoy Syracuse and the suburban life we were settling into.
One tragic day in 2021, Rob’s life was taken by undiagnosed heart disease, and our family was left trying to figure out how to carry on. Fortunately, within a few weeks, I found HOPE, and the kids and I started attending peer counseling on a regular basis. After about a year, Audrey, Sam, and I all moved on from HOPE, but at our own individual pace and with the comfort of knowing we could always return.
I would return on occasion, as would the kids, but we grew stronger. HOPE provided us with a pathway to understand our grief and move from our sadness to a place where hope in daily life felt achievable again.
Much of my ability to raise my children without Rob was because of my loving father, Len, lending a helping hand. Len, fondly known as Grandpa K, was ever-present in our lives. He babysat, chauffeured the kids around town, took them out on his boat in the summertime, and skiing in the winter. Then another tragic moment struck. Len suffered a heart attack in August 2023. Despite receiving the best medical attention available in the Syracuse and Rochester areas, he was unable to recover. Our family lost another rock in our lives.
Fortunately, my children and I knew exactly where to go, and we returned to HOPE. HOPE picked us up once again, and we were able to work through our grief as we had before. This time, however, we knew we could do it.
If there is anything I have learned, it is that grief never fully heals. We learned to cope and to move forward. We learned that life can still be beautiful, happy, and full of opportunity if we choose to let it be. And finally, we learned that keeping our loved ones’ memories alive is part of that path to happiness.
Knowing that HOPE is there when we need it gives us the confidence to take on life the way our loved ones would want us to. HOPE gave us the tools to succeed.
